Posts tagged "story"
thisisurheichouspeaking:

Art dump part 4
okay story time
so my art teacher assigned us to do a chalk pastel still life of fruits n shit and I was like “no”
so I drew a banana instead.
and my teacher came by like “you need to have more than one fruit in your still life”
so I was like “k”
and so I put that cherry on top of the banana and titled it “Banana Split Without The Ice Cream Because Life Is Full Of Disappointments: By Fall Out Boy" and I turned that shit in.
My art teacher just started laughing out loud in the middle of class

thisisurheichouspeaking:

Art dump part 4

okay story time

so my art teacher assigned us to do a chalk pastel still life of fruits n shit and I was like “no”

so I drew a banana instead.

and my teacher came by like “you need to have more than one fruit in your still life”

so I was like “k”

and so I put that cherry on top of the banana and titled it “Banana Split Without The Ice Cream Because Life Is Full Of Disappointments: By Fall Out Boy" and I turned that shit in.

My art teacher just started laughing out loud in the middle of class

(via tentaclemonsterhair)

Comments are here

The First And True Language Of America (via notalwaysright.com)

  • GROCERY STORE | SANTA FE, NM, USA |
  • (I’m waiting in line behind a woman speaking on her cellphone in another language. Ahead of her is a white man. After the woman hangs up, he speaks up.)
  • Man: “I didn’t want to say anything while you were on the phone, but you’re in America now. You need to speak English.”
  • Woman: “Excuse me?”
  • Man: *very slow* “If you want to speak Mexican, go back to Mexico. In America, we speak English.”
  • Woman: “Sir, I was speaking Navajo. If you want to speak English, go back to England.”
Comments are here

diluvians:

lanius:

girlsgetbusyzine:

gayblowjob:

“This is really NORMAL. 
Except we never see it-so it is terrifying and uncomfortable when it happens. 
(Mostly because people would laugh or be unkind)

I own a sex shop. Once a woman bled on our chair during an interview. She was horrified and felt ashamed because it was in some way unprofessional. We weren’t bothered. We said ‘what better place to work on being ok with your body than at a feminist sex shop?’
Bleeding is normal and dealing with it is one of the most pervasive ways women are complicit in their silence.

Some men bleed too. How would you react to that? For many men who are Trans the act of bleeding is a security threat.

Fuck off with your lolz.”

Photos by Arvida Bystrom

I really like this, because as a woman, your period is something to be hidden from everyone, don’t make any noise with a pad, don’t let anyone see you wearing a pad, don’t let you tampon string hang out, don’t wear this, this and this on your period and for god’s sake don’t be unprepared when it starts, because then you’ll get blood everywhere. A women’s period is something to be rejoiced as an act of fertility, your body is just letting you know you can make new people so why is it such a shame to have a period?

fucking this.

(via toriinn)

Comments are here

notyourstandardops:

fuckyou-fuckme-fuckit:

disneygirlxx:

martin-munster:

munchflower:

When my daughter first showed signs of hating herself, I got out photoshop. We went and found an image of her choosing, of a woman. I spent the next two hours showing her just how easy it was to alter this woman. I changed her hair, whitened her teeth, made her thinner. I erased her blemishes and even made her taller while my daughter sat there aghast. At the end of it she loudly said - ” THAT’S NOT FAIR!” 

I told her that damn near every image she saw of people in magazines, on television, etc, was altered like this, and that she should never compare herself to that, because even supermodels don’t look like supermodels. 

I wish I could do that for every child. I wish it was a mandatory class in school.

image

I AM SHOWING THIS TO EVERYONE 

I SAW THIS IN CLASS BEFORE. THE TEACHER WAS ALL LIKE ”please, never compare yourself to people you see in magazines. They’re always altered. It’s as easy as that.” I ALMOST STOOD UP AND YELLED ”AMEN, MISS. AMEN.”

France want’s to put a health warning on images like these

(via toriinn)

Comments are here

r3d1sth3b3stcolor:

falcon-knight:

ok STORYTIME

my mom gave me this gift for my birthday

image

at first i was like

image

please don’t tell me it’s a sex toy

image

but then i was like

oh it’s a necklace in which you can put a special pearl

and i-

image

make a wish?

image

image

image

i think i just became a magical girl.

coolest fucking gift ever

(via otaku4life14)

Comments are here
kittilumpo:

terezidactyl:

shots fucking fired by dunkin’ donuts

the coffee from dunkin’ donuts has so much caffeine in a “small mocha” that i blacked out after drinking one at the airport and the nurse/medic said my vitals were fucked up enough that she thought i was suffering from a heart attack before i came to. i’m 18. it turns out their “coffee” is actually a shit ton of espresso, which is more concentrated. i almost died.
just drink tim hortons. it’s delicious. normal caffeine. no starbucks. everyone lives. they make fresh donuts.

kittilumpo:

terezidactyl:

shots fucking fired by dunkin’ donuts

the coffee from dunkin’ donuts has so much caffeine in a “small mocha” that i blacked out after drinking one at the airport and the nurse/medic said my vitals were fucked up enough that she thought i was suffering from a heart attack before i came to. i’m 18. it turns out their “coffee” is actually a shit ton of espresso, which is more concentrated. i almost died.

just drink tim hortons. it’s delicious. normal caffeine. no starbucks. everyone lives. they make fresh donuts.

(via otaku4life14)

Comments are here
iamsexuallyvoracious:

itsjustfirealarms:

call-me-doctor-benzedrine:

jolly-old-owlgoggles20:

thebucketless13:

dr-amy:

miniprancer:

scarincissies:

misuse-of-fandom:

So I got a detention today.
Which is kinda dumb because I’m (mostly) a model student, you know? And get this - Heres what Im in for: I said…*whispers* a swear word in class. 60 minutes of punishment for the phrase: “That’s really shitty.”
So this is how it went down: I’m sitting in math class last hour before break and my teacher hands me a little slip saying that i gotta go see the vice principal. And im thinking, “damn, i thought she forgot about that.” The horrible cuss word was uttered a few days beforehand and, well, i figured she didnt even remember. I walk down there (in my full-body cat kigurumi btw) and mrs. Whatever isnt there. So i mull around and steal a candy cane off the offices mini fake tree (Im already in trouble anyways so gotta go big or go home) until finally, i talk to the desk lady who calls the vice principal down. We walk into the room and start to have a chat about how our high school doesnt tolerate swears bluh bluh etc and that i should find alternatives to cussing. Thats where this picture comes in. This lady just fucking WHIPS this goddamn list out of nowhere and shows it to me in a completely serious manner. “Heres some examples of words you can use when you want to swear.” W H A T.
Goof nugget? Sweet onions? Shooby Darn??? Pokemon??????
And here she is in all seriousness and im trying not to laugh while asking if i can have a photocopy because this is actual comedic GOLD. This sort of phooey doesnt actually happen in real life, right? I mean holy snappin turtles what the frog is this Skikaka? Jumpin Jiminy, Public school is bogus!

what the William Shatner is going on here?!

I approve of these so hard

"Well doesn’t that just bruise your banana"

I use at least half of these around my family

"Oh for the love of Barbara Streisand."
I dunno what you’re going on about. This is actually pretty useful.

did your vice principal steal this from patrick stump

"Well, doesn’t that just bruise your banana"

Crossed out is YOU SON OF A MOTHERLESS GOAT

iamsexuallyvoracious:

itsjustfirealarms:

call-me-doctor-benzedrine:

jolly-old-owlgoggles20:

thebucketless13:

dr-amy:

miniprancer:

scarincissies:

misuse-of-fandom:

So I got a detention today.

Which is kinda dumb because I’m (mostly) a model student, you know? And get this - Heres what Im in for: I said…*whispers* a swear word in class. 60 minutes of punishment for the phrase: “That’s really shitty.”

So this is how it went down: I’m sitting in math class last hour before break and my teacher hands me a little slip saying that i gotta go see the vice principal. And im thinking, “damn, i thought she forgot about that.” The horrible cuss word was uttered a few days beforehand and, well, i figured she didnt even remember. I walk down there (in my full-body cat kigurumi btw) and mrs. Whatever isnt there. So i mull around and steal a candy cane off the offices mini fake tree (Im already in trouble anyways so gotta go big or go home) until finally, i talk to the desk lady who calls the vice principal down. We walk into the room and start to have a chat about how our high school doesnt tolerate swears bluh bluh etc and that i should find alternatives to cussing. Thats where this picture comes in. This lady just fucking WHIPS this goddamn list out of nowhere and shows it to me in a completely serious manner. “Heres some examples of words you can use when you want to swear.” W H A T.

Goof nugget?
Sweet onions?
Shooby Darn???
Pokemon??????

And here she is in all seriousness and im trying not to laugh while asking if i can have a photocopy because this is actual comedic GOLD. This sort of phooey doesnt actually happen in real life, right? I mean holy snappin turtles what the frog is this Skikaka? Jumpin Jiminy, Public school is bogus!

what the William Shatner is going on here?!

I approve of these so hard

"Well doesn’t that just bruise your banana"

I use at least half of these around my family

"Oh for the love of Barbara Streisand."

I dunno what you’re going on about. This is actually pretty useful.

did your vice principal steal this from patrick stump

"Well, doesn’t that just bruise your banana"

Crossed out is YOU SON OF A MOTHERLESS GOAT

(via toriinn)

Comments are here

nerdsarerhapsodic:

One of the kids in my high school class was born on April Fool’s and his dad missed his birth because when his mom called to say she was in labour he laughed and hung up on her

(via otaku4life14)

Comments are here
shinyv:

sixthrock:

angrynerdyblogger:

laughingsquid:

Inside Action Park, The World’s Most Dangerous Amusement Park

OK but no this park has been haunting my dreams since I reblogged this yesterday and I did some research and just well here are a few of my favourite quotes you will not be disappointed with this park
General:
"The Alpine Slide concept was simple enough: you sat on a sled and descended down concrete tracks using a hand brake to control your speed, either slowly or at a speed described by a former park employee as "death awaits"." 
"The Tarzan Swing was known for scraped toe knuckles and also the shock that people would experience when their bodies were immersed in the icy cold water below. The water was so cold that people would forget how to swim once they hit it." 
"[The Cannonball Loop (ride pictured)] supposedly dismembered test dummies and maybe even a few park employees in trial runs.” 
"The Super Speedboats could go up to 35-40 miles an hour and were treated like bumper boats by park attendees. They were also set up in a swamp, in the middle of which was a small, rocky island populated by an uneasy alliance of water snakes and lifeguards." 
Former Employees:
“They actually had the audacity to have a “slow” lane and a “fast” lane. They should have been called “injured” lane and “dead” lane.” 
“One of these vigorous “shoots” was particularly intriguing, as it would suck you in and then immediately make an abrupt 90 degree turn. Not a 45 degree turn. Not even a nice, slow, smooth, curvy 90 degree turn. No. It would literally slam you into a wall and toss you in a different direction and then project your young, gnarled body into a gooey pond of crying kids and water snakes. It was awesome.” 
“Finally, the third thing that would catch your attention was the ubiquitous “first aid cart.” Kind of like a golf cart, piloted by two zitty teens wearing oversized EMT shirts, the cart would inevitably be seen looping through the trails, grass, and little forests that surrounded the park.” 
“People giving the finger, shouting descriptive and awful things, and undressing in midair were commonplace.” 
"We used to steal kegs, drink the beer, ride the Indy cars down Route 94, crash the Indy cars, get the Indy cars back to the park without anybody seeing us (there were only three cops in Vernon back then) and then go for a swim at the pools to sober up."
And, my personal favourite:
"The Cannonball Loop was the brainchild of some Swiss guy they imported on a week-long visa. I was one of the idiots that accepted you-know-who’s crisp $100 bill to test run it. That was my last ride. $100 did not buy enough booze to drown out that memory." 
[Source]

Oh man the wiki article for this place is great too.
The descriptions for every one of the rides are pretty much one sentence explaining what the ride is, and then five more sentences detailing all the different ways people got maimed on that ride.
AWESOME

"and the park eventually bought the township of Vernon extra ambulances to keep up with the volume."
amazing

shinyv:

sixthrock:

angrynerdyblogger:

laughingsquid:

Inside Action Park, The World’s Most Dangerous Amusement Park

OK but no this park has been haunting my dreams since I reblogged this yesterday and I did some research and just well here are a few of my favourite quotes you will not be disappointed with this park

General:

  • "The Alpine Slide concept was simple enough: you sat on a sled and descended down concrete tracks using a hand brake to control your speed, either slowly or at a speed described by a former park employee as "death awaits"." 
  • "The Tarzan Swing was known for scraped toe knuckles and also the shock that people would experience when their bodies were immersed in the icy cold water below. The water was so cold that people would forget how to swim once they hit it." 
  • "[The Cannonball Loop (ride pictured)] supposedly dismembered test dummies and maybe even a few park employees in trial runs.” 
  • "The Super Speedboats could go up to 35-40 miles an hour and were treated like bumper boats by park attendees. They were also set up in a swamp, in the middle of which was a small, rocky island populated by an uneasy alliance of water snakes and lifeguards." 

Former Employees:

  • They actually had the audacity to have a “slow” lane and a “fast” lane. They should have been called “injured” lane and “dead” lane.” 
  • One of these vigorous “shoots” was particularly intriguing, as it would suck you in and then immediately make an abrupt 90 degree turn. Not a 45 degree turn. Not even a nice, slow, smooth, curvy 90 degree turn. No. It would literally slam you into a wall and toss you in a different direction and then project your young, gnarled body into a gooey pond of crying kids and water snakes. It was awesome.” 
  • Finally, the third thing that would catch your attention was the ubiquitous “first aid cart.” Kind of like a golf cart, piloted by two zitty teens wearing oversized EMT shirts, the cart would inevitably be seen looping through the trails, grass, and little forests that surrounded the park.” 
  • People giving the finger, shouting descriptive and awful things, and undressing in midair were commonplace.” 
  • "We used to steal kegs, drink the beer, ride the Indy cars down Route 94, crash the Indy cars, get the Indy cars back to the park without anybody seeing us (there were only three cops in Vernon back then) and then go for a swim at the pools to sober up."

And, my personal favourite:

  • "The Cannonball Loop was the brainchild of some Swiss guy they imported on a week-long visa. I was one of the idiots that accepted you-know-who’s crisp $100 bill to test run it. That was my last ride. $100 did not buy enough booze to drown out that memory." 

[Source]

Oh man the wiki article for this place is great too.

The descriptions for every one of the rides are pretty much one sentence explaining what the ride is, and then five more sentences detailing all the different ways people got maimed on that ride.

AWESOME

"and the park eventually bought the township of Vernon extra ambulances to keep up with the volume."

amazing

(via beestiel)

Comments are here

hardknockstrokes:

The guys hooked me up with a good looking pineapple for prom. I “sedjuiced” him later

I regret nothing

And that’s how I ended my senior year

Lesson: Never be ashamed to go alone

(via otaku4life14)

Comments are here
shiroi-shiro:

sleeepynatural:

NOBODY IS KIDDING WHEN THEY SAY THINGS LIKE THAT ABOUT DAVID BOWIE.

I love how even adults struggle. I feel less… small because of this.

shiroi-shiro:

sleeepynatural:

NOBODY IS KIDDING WHEN THEY SAY THINGS LIKE THAT ABOUT DAVID BOWIE.

I love how even adults struggle. I feel less… small because of this.

(via stereolimit)

Comments are here
yukkaplant:

In 1971, social psychologist Philip Zimbardo set out to interrogate the ways in which people conform to social roles, using a group of male college students to take part in a two-week-long experiment in which they would live as prisoners and guards in a mock prison. However, having selected his test subjects, Zimbardo assigned them their roles without their knowledge, unexpectedly arresting the “prisoners” outside their own homes. The results were disturbing. Ordinary college students turned into viciously sadistic guards or spineless (and increasingly distraught) prisoners, becoming deeply enmeshed within the roles they were playing. After just six days, the distressing reality of this “prison” forced Zimbardo to prematurely end the experiment.

yukkaplant:

In 1971, social psychologist Philip Zimbardo set out to interrogate the ways in which people conform to social roles, using a group of male college students to take part in a two-week-long experiment in which they would live as prisoners and guards in a mock prison. However, having selected his test subjects, Zimbardo assigned them their roles without their knowledge, unexpectedly arresting the “prisoners” outside their own homes. The results were disturbing. Ordinary college students turned into viciously sadistic guards or spineless (and increasingly distraught) prisoners, becoming deeply enmeshed within the roles they were playing. After just six days, the distressing reality of this “prison” forced Zimbardo to prematurely end the experiment.

(via toriinn)

Comments are here
carry-on-my-jingle-butt:

sengawolf:

terrestrial-organic-matter:

VIVA LA REVOLUTION

wHY IS THERE A CRUSTACEAN IN THE LAB

MEHOYNOYNEHOY

carry-on-my-jingle-butt:

sengawolf:

terrestrial-organic-matter:

VIVA LA REVOLUTION

wHY IS THERE A CRUSTACEAN IN THE LAB

MEHOYNOYNEHOY

(via otaku4life14)

Comments are here

khaliasenpai:

whalegod:

tell me a secret

one time in high school i was sick with strep throat but the school refused to let me leave until after lunch and i was miserable all morning. so as revenge i coughed on my hands and rubbed them all up and down the stair well railing because i was angry and miserable.

about a month later literally half the school was sick with strep and bad colds. oops.

(via otaku4life14)

Comments are here
oldnewborrowedbluebox:

clayinthehandsofourfather:

My roommate thought it was a real horse.

i have to admit so did i for a second there

oldnewborrowedbluebox:

clayinthehandsofourfather:

My roommate thought it was a real horse.

i have to admit so did i for a second there

(via otaku4life14)

Comments are here

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Hi~! Call me Vila, Giu, Vilachan, or w/e. It work~!
Languages/Lenguajes: English // Español (Spanish)
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Hi whoever reads this! don't worry about me.. I'm Just a dude that dreams a lot |'D
 Feel free to contact me as I blog and stuff & I'll most likely talk to you. o u o)/
Warning: I post random stuff. 8D
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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~¡Hola! Normalmente posteo en Ingles, pero aveces posteo en español xD rebloggeo lo que me gusta~

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